~*~Life as Me~*~

"Happying up the Internet"

Ok guyses, over the next few weeks is going to be a few minor changes here, mosting inspirational, some sponsorships and an ongoing theme that includes "happying up the internet" which I want you all to give some serious thought and action to.

Click to go to the site

For anyone that knows me will know that I have been through some extreme challenges throughout my life and while I am mostly a positive person I do have times/days where I feel like I just cant keep fighting it anymore. I dont suffer from depression {thankfully} but I am human and I do hurt and let things overwhelm me, I moan, I complain and I have even been known to feel sorry for myself! For the most part I am happy, positive and live a good life, if not erratic at times! I have recently been told I am a fine example as a survivor but I resent that label, I am not a survivor of anything, I am a fighter. To me there is a little difference between the two. A survivor is gaining control, gaining themself again after a traumatic ordeal. A fighter is almost the next step from survivor and refusing to let the past/damage or whatever it is be in control of who they are or where they are going. I am a fighter. I stand alone at times for what my heart tells me is right, I stand with people for what I know is right and I do not {intentionally} instigate negativeness, though I may react negatively to begin with in some situations. On the other side of this I am quite an intelligent person, I am educated, I have life experience that i'm not afraid to admit to or share, I am compassionate and accomodating. I can be full of wisdom or full of humour, I am unique to myself and I try to stay true to myself as much as possible. At times I am boring, other times I am facinating and interesting. Whatever I am in other peoples opinion is fine by me, while I do my best to be my best I will not always be right or get it right. Without gratitude I am just a mere shell of a human being.

SO.....when the boss over at Modern Molly Mormon and I got chatting about a possible study group on facebook, I remembered I had to go read her blog {Jia is a fab blogger if you wanna go looksee} and I totally loved her latest couple of posts more so cos they are the theme of my mind, generally speaking. Gratitude. Clicking the link Jia provided I went to see what it was all about and I am so excited to find that Natasha is calling on anyone and everyone to come along and enrich ourselves and those around us just by remembering our blessings in our every day life, in the face of adversity and 'just because'.

If you have a blog, please add the thingy up above and take part in this effort to not only help ourselves but to " happy up the internet" cos lets face it, there's so much crap, filth and evil out there its only by our small but significant efforts that we can begin to make a small effort with big rewards! Please remember to link it up to Natasha though and give her a mention.

At the end of each relative post I will be sharing 5 things I am grateful for at that time. Sometimes it might be a tiny thing that would sound silly to someone else, other times it could be something deep but whatever it is, its MY gratitude that will help me to continue to be the best I can be and in turn enable me to be a better mother, friend, daughter or whatever role I play. Its all good stuff! :)

 

• I am grateful for the knowledge I have that Jesus Christ understands every aspect of my life, He understands, He knows and He is always willing to help me through a hard time.
• I am grateful that I was able to have children and that I have been blessed with 4 people who genuinely give me a divine reason and purpose.
• I am grateful for my talents {not self selling here!} oddly enough I have a few of them and love to do them and share them where I can.
• I am grateful for the few very close friends that I have who have lent their shoulders to cry on, foot to boot my butt or time to help me through a hard time. Best of all is when they let me into their hearts and lives and allow me to be their friend when they need me most.
• I am grateful for the many people in my life who are inspiring, funny, creative, hard working and decent. The role of each of these people are on and offline but all are valued so much to me.

~*~Debs~*~

Book of You. Pt 2

Over on Modern Molly Mormon is the 2nd part of the Book of You challenge. Here goes it:

Last month I started the ongoing challenge of us Mum’s doing something to record our story ready to hand over to our kids in years to come. For anyone that understands the counsel we have had about keeping a journal or had the opportunity to read an ancestors journal you will immediately understand how crucial this challenge can be years down the line when we leave this earth. I’m sure though that a book about who we are can be enjoyed long before then though!

This month is part 2. I started by suggesting you begin using your initial, this time use the second letter in your first name and find as many words with that letter that can be used to describe or relate to you.

This time though I think we need to add a bit of fun with it too, spend a few minutes going through the dictionary/thesaurus, write as many words down with that letter and ask close family/friends or even your children what they think. This is such a laugh to do and really gets the belly laughs going (unless it's just my family and friends that think I’m a bit ‘’off’’!!!)

Use each word as the sub heading for a paragraph or page. Add photos, doodling, mementoes or anything else relevant. Tell a related story, share a feeling on the description and even set a goal to improve if you feel the need!

Also include other things, like what foods you like, favourite show at the moment, what song keeps humming in your head even what your to-do list is today! Remember it's all about YOU!

To offer some of my own Book of Me here is some of my words:

{DEBORAH}:

E for education: I didn’t really put the effort in on my school exams till 6 months before my finals, how I got the qualifications I did is still a mystery to me. Since then I have studied hard in a variety of subjects and have a healthy list of qualifications including a degree in psychology. I love to learn and learn from most things I read, watch, listen to or take part in. my learning style is by visual, having dyscalculia means I struggle with numbers and sequences but using visual I have found my own way of learning and understanding. In doing this my self esteem has risen a great deal.

E for empathy: I often say to people who know of my past, ‘do not feel sorry for me, I do not want or need it’ I also tell them that is because of my past that I am who I am but what I didn’t realise is by making this demand limits the persons response to me and actually hinders their empathy abilities. It wasn’t until I was in a deep conversation with a psychologist friend that I really understood empathy and the essential part it plays in us, our hearts and our lives. Feeling empathy for others is more beneficial and healthy than sympathy in many ways, but figuring out the two is still something I sit and ponder. Empathy is good!

E for even: Being as I am a true Libra style chick I have, many times over the years read up on astrology, bio rhythms and such just for fun and half wondering if they are even close to who I am. The scales is the sign of the Librans and I have to admit I am totally the scales! Symmetry is something I am trying to move away from, the balance in my life throws me sideways if it’s tipped and while unbalance is not always good it is a part of life. This tells me a lot about who I am and how I do things. Just glad I’m not water…. i’d never know where I am!! ;)

E for English: Two-fold, first I am British born and bred, proud to be an English chick and love all of our beautiful English countryside and history. On the other side of it I have always had a deep rooted interest in the English language, literature and words. We have some of the most silliest words and yet we have some funny and awesome words too. I love playing with words especially when I’m in a situation where I feel intimidated, my education kicks in then and my sentences often seem like they are something from the Oxford exam papers!

E for eldest: I am the eldest of four children. I have always hated this role but short of forging my birth certificate there’s not a lot I can do! I’ve never felt like I’m the oldest as the next one down is my brother who was raised to ‘take care’ of us girls which he did a good job of! The youngest of us, my 2^nd brother, is where I get a lot of my inspiration from as he is academic like myself and even though there is 11 years between us he teaches me a whole lot more than I could ever teach him! My eldest child is my best friend, he and I spend hours laughing and analysing the world around us. With Jay being dyslexic it's great to see how his English progresses all the time, even with the spoken word.

E for excellent: Ok this one came from my 4 year old, when I asked him to choose one of three words to say about mummy he decided that I am ‘excellent’!! So, because he chose it and it's his idealised opinion of mummy I am going to keep it in my journal because experience tells me I’m not too far away from excellent turning to something not quite so complimentary!! Lol

These are just a few of the things I have journalled but I hope you get an idea of what this project is all about. If you wish to take part, let me know and if you do it online I’ll link you up to my blog and add you to the challenge list!

Next month I will share with you my actual book and the next letter, B. For now I am still working on getting the design together in between adding to the D and E as and when I think of something so if you are doing yours off the computer, remember to add pages between each letter cos you can always add to it over time.

I got emailed by a lady called Heidi who asked me if I was going to offer some hints and tips being as this kinda thing is my business area, and because I love you Molly Mormon Ladies I am going to extend it to all you guys when I have it completed, and yes it's totally free! ;) I will add the download to it next month.

Happy days!

~*~Debs~*~

22 Things for the kids to do with/without parents

My latest article posted over on Modern Molly Mormon is below, i'm posting it here because I think its a pretty good list of stuff for all kids of all ages to have fun with as the summer school holiday looms ahead.

Need some ideas for the summer holidays? Well I've been working on a few that my kids can do when they finish school for the summer in June....so I thought I'd share...

1. Scrapbook ~ I don’t think suggesting this would be a surprise to anyone! Back in the day scrapbooking was just a scrap book that we would stick odd cut outs of our favourite shoes or hairstyles etc. I suggest going back to this time with our kids and encourage them to scrapbook various things through their days to show their highlights. By the time school starts, all those words that have been muttered ‘I am bored’ or ‘I do not get to do anything fun’ will be right there in pictures to show them! Kids of any age will enjoy making their own summer journal, even toddlers.

2. Garden pots ~ Even if you have your own garden area and the kids are happy to help, why not get them some small pots {or larger if you have the space} exclusively for them? Giving them some responsibility is a proven method that most kids thrive for and more often than not, live up to above and beyond. Smaller children love to get dirty so why not give them some tiny pots and either sunflower seeds or pretend flowers?

3. Artist folder ~ Similar to the scrapbook, give the kids their very own folder with sheets of plain paper inside and let them create. This is ideal in the car, waiting at the dentist, in a restaurant on just sat on the sofa. When each page is complete, date it and get them to sign it!

4. Disposable camera ~ I know my 4 year old loves it when he gets to randomly take photos of anything and everything. Naturally, I don’t print many of his photos but I do make up a slide show on the computer for him so he can sit and admire his talent! Kids love all that dodging around like a little pro just to get that perfect shot…minus the head! A disposable is cheap; bump proof and stops arguments between siblings.

5. Bird watching ~ We live in an area that isn’t exactly close to a beach yet we get loads of seagulls and other birds associated with the waters. Having multiple trees in our garden means, we usually have birds around here. Having kids with toy binoculars, laying on a blanket spotting birds, comparing them to a book {use the library for some good ones} will keep them quiet for ages, plus it will work their imaginations and most likely get them chatting about clouds and other things they see!

6. Flower spotting ~ If you are in an area where your kids can just wonder through a field or arboretum garden of some sort, pack them up with a book, magnifying glass and a bottle of water and see what they find. Chances are they will find bugs, creepy crawlies, and other things too.

7. Word games ~ There are loads of different kinds of printables online, my kids love making small words out of larger ones. This is another versatile game that can be done almost anywhere at any time and aids their reading and spelling without them quite realising it!

8. Home theatre ~ many children love to act out, dress up, and emulate a favourite singer, actress or other favourite character. All they need are a few old clothes, a few curtains, and a place to perform!

9. Garden disco ~ especially for the girls, fancy skirts/tops, a pretty hairstyle and some music to dance along to! Invite kids over to join in and the rest just unfolds!

10. Garden party ~ this can be as minimal or extravagant as you like, give the kids a few games (ball games, skipping, water slides etc) some food and maybe an adult or two and they will be entertained all day!

11. Hammer n nails ~ One for the boys (or tomboys out there!) My 4 yr old loves nothing more than to sit with a plank of wood, mini sized hammer and some nails. Obviously, this would need parental supervision but it keeps the boys quiet! For older kids maybe they can make a box, bird feeder, or something equally simple.

12. Sewing box ~ scraps of fabric, needles and thread and anything can happen. Cut out a simple shapes
such as a teddy bear so it only needs the edge sewing and stuffing with off cuts of fabric, cut lots of squares to stitch into a blanket or even a bag. Old clothes are great for this and very inexpensive. Boys enjoy this almost as much as the girls

13. Cook for a family ~ this can be as basic as burgers and fries or if your kids are older a 3 course meal. Letting them plan, shop and prepare a meal will boost their confidence and keep them focused for hours! Moreover, you don’t get to cook either!

14. Camping in the garden ~ Lets face it, all kids like to camp out even if it is only the garden! If you have toddlers go camp out with them! Grab some flashlights, books and nibbles and the kids will have the best night of their life!

15. Kid’s yard sale ~ Hands up if your kids have a load of unused toys, books, games etc? (My 2 hands are up!) let them get in on the act of taking care of their needs and hold a yard sale, with the proceeds they can perhaps use it to learn the first steps in financing or buy a new toy/book/game or even better, save it and watch it grow in their bank!

16. Write your book ~ Every kid has a story to tell, it's not going to be the one we tell about that exact same experience or trip to the supermarket. Give them a book and pen, shoot ideas to what they can write about, use bullet points so they aren’t overwhelmed if they aren’t fans of writing. Make a front page cover, choose a book title and tell them how much YOU want to know what their life story is from their view.

17. Role play banker/shopper/parents i.e. finances/thrift ~ A small table and chair, a few packets/tins from food storage and a few friends and you have a shop. Add some boxes, envelopes and a satchel style bag for a post office. Make pretend money from strips of paper, make a till from a narrow box and you have a bank. The imagination is endless with just a few items here and all the while kids are learning about some important principles! Especially if their bank is empty and they only have limited funds at the food store!

18. Papier-mache ~ Bowls, mountains, plant pots, jewellery holders, pen cups, action man mounds and more. Just a few ideas to get the kids into creative play, recycling old papers/magazines is an added bonus for our Green issues!

19. Service project for neighbour ~ With the nice weather here (at last) get the kids out doing their own service project for a local neighbour or family member. Anything from reading to someone, going to the store, cutting grass, feeding pets or even making them a snack will give the kids are all sense of accomplishment!

20. Learn an instrument ~ This isn’t as hard as it looks, nor does it have to cost much money. Freecycle can offer some good old instruments to good homes, yard sales (trying really hard to get Americanised here!!) and thrift stores. Libraries offer books for beginners, they don’t have to be perfect or even last longer than the summer, but chances are, once they start and see how easy they can pick something up they will want to carry on!

21. Buddy a younger person ~ Does your child know someone who would benefit from having a buddy? Is your child one who would benefit from a buddy? Maybe assigning a buddy to someone will reach out to someone and give something they need most, from confidence, faith in themselves, a hard time at home or anything at all. Great works are done when we have someone to look out for us and the rewards are outstanding for those giving their time and effort to someone too.

22. Body/hand/foot painting ~ Ok so you guys can join in here, I know my kids just love it when we have messy play. Having washable floors makes it easier if the weather is cold but in all the clean up is simple with a hose when outdoors. Just get some plain rolls of wall paper, loads of washable paints and let the fun begin!

If your children are anything like mine then they are going to wanna work through that list throughout the summer, which isn't necessarily a bad thing considering how long summer is for them! As usual, I would love to hear what anyone does from this list and hope at least one of the ideas gives you a kick start! :)

Happy Birthday Jia

Today is Jia's birthday, she's the big ole age of 25, hailing from New Mexico and is married to her sweetheart Matt. Jia is also the founder of Modern Molly Mormon and is a totally amazing person who I have much respect and liking for in her own right. I also admire Jia because she runs a tight but flixible ship over on MMM, there is so much inspiration on the outside of the blog but behind the scenes she is also a wonderful ''boss'' who knows what she wants but knows how to love 'us' anyway and show us how much she appreciates us. The time and effort Jia puts into the success of MMM is awesome, its her 'baby' and through her passion she has inspired many, especially myself.

So I just wanna say a big......

I for one am glad to know Jia, she inspires me so much in many ways and I hope to be around for along time yet cos I know there is a lot more good stuff I can learn from this chick!

Pop on over to her blog and wish her a happy birthday....cos like all of us she loves to celebrate the good stuff!!!

~*~Debs~*~

I tried going cold turkey....and I survived!! :)

I have come to realise I can survive without blogging.

Yep, really, I can!

No more have I been worrying about not doing this or that on here, instead I've got on with my days, spent more time with real life people doing real life things and having real life fun.

But I do MISS blogging though.

There's something about sharing my thoughts, feelings, ideas, sharing others perspectives and various spiritual/religious stuff that I feel are worth sharing.

So I've been doing some thinking, instead of taking on so much like I have previously, and then fretting when something in life crops up and interefers with it, I'm going to not promise anything, but leave it to my newsletters to report anything upcoming that week that I will have pre-written and scheduled to post.

Problem solved!

My other part of online living is also reduced, i dont have as much time to go blog hopping anymore, though i'm sure it'll resurface at a later date! Instead I am working on some home changes that is too early to talk about and the freelance writing i've somehow gotten into doing. I will still be writing for Modern Molly Mormon. I have now been assigned to three specialised categories and an Inspriation category, this will give me more of a focus and keep us Mollies in some kind of perspective when it comes to Jia's site.

Life over on MMM is in the throes of becoming something phenominal, there are some fantastic changes coming along. Jia and Tiffany are total stars for the effort, time and commitment they put into Modern Molly Mormon and us girls. The girls are fantastic too, everyone of them has a great input that is well worth reading.

I am still taking on other freelance writing assignments, I cant see that changing for a while, but it is great for keeping my mind busy. I love the diversity of subjects I am asked to write about, I have found out about some great causes, groups and social events through some of these assignments. I come across information on such a diversity of subjects that each assignment is like opening a gift, you never know what is going to be in that email! Last week I wrote a piece about using psychology when teaching a principle to a stubborn teen, oh was that so fitting! Having two children that are a spit out of my mouth in independance {read stubborn} I had a wealth of do's and donts, how to's and how not to's to share! Putting humour in most of my writings is almost natural for me so when it comes to stuff that I can reference my kids, I have fun with it without revealing too much about them {they still gotta have their privacy} So i'm gaining much more than just writing about experience but i'm getting a working mind that is learning a range of other things along the way!

I have also been doing some unofficial missionary work with some peeps I talk to on an lds social site, we have had 2 nights in a conference chat going through the various aspects of the Lds faith, that was way cool and has helped boost my testimony a great deal. There's something warming about sharing your testimony to someone, of hearing their thoughts, opinions and ideas, listening to their life experiences and put together their personalities, answering questions and sharing links and scripture. The Holy Ghost was definitely in these chats!

My kids are doing fab right now, Scott has officially been offered a place in Birmingham University, he so had his heart set on getting in, but I knew through my prayers that he was going to do it. Even his college tutor expected this of him!

I am SO, SO darn proud of my boy!!

Charley still talks of his daddy but not in the same way. He did however, pull the wishbone of the chicken with Kirsten, when he got to make the wish he said: I wish my daddy loved me. At this point Kirsten turned round and punched the door in frustration, tears for charley more than a sore hand. She's ok though thankfully. Charley is processing all this in his own way but life goes on and we are pulling in a direction together right now and there are more laughs and good times than anything negative. I'm not going to share my feelings on this, but I know Charley will be ok and right now he seems to just be happy being Fireman Charley living in the Fire Station and being chauffeur driven in Jupiter!!

Me, i'm top o the world! Very busy dashing here and there, sorting this, writing that, playing this game or reading that book but you know what? It really is good stuff. School is finished now for two weeks and while Kirsten has no plans to go visit her dad I am eagerly working on some kind of rota for her to keep active and busy in the things she's started lately. I must remember to get my wheel fixed on my bike, its the prefect weather to go for a bike ride over the forest of dean right now!! I am liking how our days are going.

Kirsten went to her uncle's wedding a couple of weeks ago, she was a bridesmaid and this is just one of the gorgeous pictures of the day. Donna looked stunnin, Trev looked like the true hunk he is and Kirsten, well she just proved me right, a real Princess!! ;)

Most Wednesdays we have a drive down south to see the boys, now Jay is living down there too I am forever on call for something between him and Scott. Now its become a routine that we meet up, go out for a while and just hang out. A couple of weeks ago the older boys thought it was just so cool to sit and colour the pages that Charley was given!! Lol

Not sure when I will blog again as we have a very busy weekend with General Conference scheduled for different times due to the time differences with Utah. We are off and about tomorrow before Kirsten goes to the Young Women's Conference and if the weather holds out we are adding a farm or two in beteen destinations!

Right, time to sleep!

~*~Debs~*~